Keeping in touch with friends through Facebook is one of life’s little pleasures.

Among life’s great irritants are the Facebook posts that demand I repost something as my status or else I am not a true friend; or I am against veterans or I’m a fan of cancer or I hate puppies. Or I hate cancer-ridden military dog; I lose track after a bit.

Oh, and your fifteen requests a day to play Candy Crush are also irritating.

Oh, oh and you people who let the world know that there is an immediate crisis in your life, but only in vague and cryptic terms so that we really have no idea what the problem is—cut it out. Cut it out or quit being so cryptic and give us the whole story

Then, there are those people who post something along the following lines:  I just fell down an open manhole where a sewer-dwelling alligator ate half my leg off, to which I’ll reply, Oh, no, my friend! Are you okay? And then you say, Ha! Gotcha! Now YOU have to post that you fell down a manhole where a sewer-dwelling alligator ate your leg off. Failing to repost this or another selection from an idiotic list of scenarios will result in a worldwide outbreak of malaria. And will be a sure sign that I hate puppies.

When I get on Facebook, I just want to see how you’re doing; maybe see a nice photo of your grandbaby or your dog or even your lunch. I might watch your video and I might even take your quiz to find out what French monarch I was in a past life, but I did not get on Facebook to be irritated. So, you repost-or-else, candy crushing, drama queens need to cease and desist. After all, the alligator who lives in the sewer has a Facebook page and he never posts stuff such as this.